Posts: Life Lessons
Committed to the Seeking
Learning to consistently draw near to God
Apr 29, 2024
I looked around me at all the women gathered in this dim worship center, raised hands and eyes closed, some swaying side to side, singing their hearts out, and I felt nothing. I turned my gaze back to the stage and tried to concentrate harder on the lyrics, as if mouthing them might prompt the Holy Spirit to grace me with its presence.
Purpose Behind Every Limitation
The freedom found in obedience to God’s commands
Jan 18, 2024
Walking out of my orthopedic appointment, I felt immediate relief in my left shoulder. The injection was kicking in and I almost cried from joy. I went home and immediately scheduled my prescribed physical therapy for the next six weeks. This was a familiar scenario. Only six years ago I was doing the same thing for my right shoulder. The diagnosis? Bursitis in both cases.
Anchored to the Ground
Feeling at home right where we are
Jul 23, 2023
I was leaving the gym on a Wednesday afternoon, walking to my car in the parking lot when it hit me. That feeling that this is where we belong, where we’re supposed to lay down roots. “This” being the town my husband and I live in. It didn’t last very long, that pleasant, comforting feeling, but it lasted long enough for me to feel reassured in our decision to move here almost two years ago.
One Pause at a Time
Learning how to recognize our default reactions
Apr 18, 2023
The argument was meaningless, as many marital arguments tend to be. One sentence became a trigger for the other, which led to defensiveness and trying to prove each other’s points. Things got taken out of context, the past was brought into the present, the words “always” and “never” got thrown around… the usual culprits.
An Outlet for the Ache
Lessons learned from a speeding ticket
Jan 26, 2023
It's 8:30 pm on a Monday in December. I'm driving home from an ASL class at a local community college. Thankfully it's not snowing, but the back-country roads of this neighboring town close to my house aren't streetlight-friendly, so I'm eager to get home and out of the pitch black. Hunger pains are also causing me to go faster than I should.
Remain in the Light
Thoughts on playing small and learning to expand
Nov 05, 2022
As a writer, there are those pieces or topics that you know need to be written but that you avoid writing for as long as possible. They’re always in the back of your mind, though, lurking, anticipating the day they’ll be cemented onto paper. They tug at you, not lovingly, until you have no choice but to tend to them, if only to shut them up.
The Layer of Harmony Underneath
Learning to trust the process
Sep 03, 2022
I’m berating myself for forgetting my earplugs. This coffee shop is noisier than I had anticipated. People’s conversations reverberate against my skin and eardrums and it’s hard to concentrate. Of course I could have stayed at home to write, but there is something about the atmosphere of a coffee shop that tugs at my writer’s mind and inspires me to show up for the craft.
The Construction Zone of Personal Development
Breaking ground, rebuilding structure, and navigating warning signs
Aug 08, 2022
Everything deteriorates, eventually. This is what crosses my mind as I’m sitting at a lovely coffee shop/chocolate shop trying to get some writing done. The aroma of chocolate in the air as you walk in is divine. It’s one of those rustic downtown buildings, faded brick on the inside, ceiling pipes and beams exposed, piles of burlap coffee sacks in the corner.
A Closer Look at Anger
What emotions have to teach us
Feb 15, 2021
Let’s talk about anger. It’s not an emotion I’m fond of, or can easily express. Rather, it’s one I try my darndest to suppress. Truth be told, it terrifies me. Anytime it wants to surface, I close the lid, reel it back in. Often, I just transform it into sadness. Aren’t they just two sides of the same coin?
The Barriers to Our Blooming
Lifting the weights that crush us
Jan 01, 2021
January 1st. It carries so much weight — both positively and negatively. It contains so much hope, and yet so much angst. Realistically, it’s just another day. But ideally, it can become so much more. A fresh start, a second chance, a new path forward, a do-over. We place so much expectation on this innocent day to deliver. We give it so much power. And so little room for error.
To Sit Quietly In A Room
Spiritual reflections on COVID-19
Mar 14, 2020
Even without stepping outside, I can feel the eerie quiet of the city. The dust is not even close to settling, but there is a feeling of culmination in the air. Of something ending, making way for a new type of living. If ever we were asked to take stock of our lives and all the precious things and people in them, it is now.
I have nothing to say.
Thoughts on finding our message and the journey to get there
Jan 13, 2020
There are many self-defeating thoughts artists and creators have over the span of their art-making journey. This must be among the top two.
Saying ‘No Thank You’ to Gratitude Practices
When popular spiritual practices just don’t work for you
Mar 19, 2019
I must confess something. It may come as a shock to some. Dare I say it out loud? Here goes… gratitude practices don’t work for me. In fact, I don’t even like them. There, I said it. Anything from gratitude lists, gratitude journaling, gratitude meditations, you name it, I’ve tried it. Repeatedly. Over an extended period of time. And it just doesn’t work for me.
You’re Not That Special
Why this thought can liberate you
Feb 26, 2019
This is the thought I have in the Uber ride home from a workshop I attended out of curiosity. It came out of nowhere, seemingly, and yet, it felt like the missing puzzle piece I was struggling to find for so long. It was one of those rare thoughts you have once in a blue moon that hits you like a brick, penetrating to the core of something you’ve been struggling with and haven’t been able to find the answer to.
Surprising Lessons From My First Winter in Chicago
Feb 19, 2019
Cold. That’s really the only thing I ever thought of when thinking about Chicago. The only thing that came to mind when I pictured the winters. Freezing may be more accurate. When it comes to certain states and their corresponding weather, we tend to have pretty well-established preconceived notions and judgments.
The Hidden Gifts of Our Dispositions
And their potential for our personal growth
Feb 12, 2019
Prone to melancholy. That’s how the pastor described the personality type #4 that I most relate to on the Enneagram. It’s a new sermon series the church started in which they teach on this ancient and insightful tool for self-awareness. My personality type — the “Individualist” — is sensitive, introspective, and self-aware, among other things.
It Takes What It Takes
Thoughts on change
Mar 13, 2018
There is no other way around it. Change. Is. Hard. Perhaps the most trying change of all is attempting to change something about ourselves — a character trait, a habit, a pattern, old beliefs and behaviors that no longer serve us. Why even bother? Because staying the same, a same that no longer feels good, is so much more painful.
This Too Is Life
Oct 29, 2017
We spent most of the crisp fall day in a downtown of a neighboring city, my husband and I, walking around the shops and restaurants, finding unique treasures in boutiques. The leaves on the ground around us just slightly losing their golden maroon color. The people walking by, pleasantly in a Sunday mood. We took selfies in front of an old brick wall.
A Mindset Shift that Transformed My Life
Oct 24, 2016
It was only the second week into the year-long women’s bible study. We were going to study Job. I had been looking forward to it for a while. It was a new church and I didn’t know any of the women. I saw it as a fresh start, a leap of faith. But only two weeks in and I was ready to call it quits. I wasn’t “feeling” it nor the group I was in; I have my HSP-ness to thank for that.
How to Hide Your Light from the World
Sep 26, 2016
First, believe the lies. All of them. The ones that make you feel small, very small, and insignificant. You know? The “you are not enough” lies and all their different variations. Don’t just accept them, ingrain them into your identity. Make them part of who you are. That is the first step.
A Letter of Apology To All My Abandoned Creative Projects
Aug 30, 2016
Dear Abandoned Creative Projects: I’m sorry. There is so much more I want to say but it must begin with this. With an apology. You do not deserve to be abandoned, left to rot in a folder or thrown into the trash. That should not be your fate. I have no one else to blame for this but my own inconsistency, my lack of commitment, my distracted mind, and my loss of interest.
What a Cracked Tree Limb Taught Me About Change
Aug 23, 2016
When it’s 11:23 pm and you are listening to a bible study sermon online, taking notes about how sin grieves the heart of God, and a tree limb outside your 3rd-floor apartment window cracks and splits off the trunk onto the roof of a car port in the parking lot, you begin to pay attention. I’m a believer in signs, in symbolism and metaphors, in the universe sending us messages that we desperately need to hear.